Monday, April 6, 2009

Why a lot of advertising people get murdered

In this industry we’re meant to be interested in everything. Which is stupid because most things aren’t interesting. By being interested in everything, you’re wasting valuable time on a lot of uninteresting things that could be spent on interesting things.
I must admit though, my curiosity was piqued today as I passed the stairs that lead into the bowels of RealMenWriteLongCopy Towers. I couldn't resist. And what a subterranean treasure trove I stumbled upon.

A caged room full of Tefal products and a plastic leopard.

The outfits from that funny tic-tacs football ad the WCRS chaps did.

A big open space of nothingness.

The place really gave me the willies actually. Every few yards, you have to go through a door that shuts behind you with a never-opening again-you’re-stuck-down-here-with-a-psycho-killer clunk. I wanted to call my mum so at least they’d know where to find the body but there was no reception down there.
That probably explains why murderers get a disproportionate amount of people from the advertising industry.
Murderering technique:
  • Hide somewhere ‘interesting’.
  • Wait for over-curious advertising person to wander in being ‘interested’.
  • Bludgeon advertising person to death.


  1. This is one of the best things I've read recently. I shall be nominating it for post of the month over at this place, shortly:

  2. adland suit
    I assumed you were joking but looks like you actually did try to nominate me (the IT gestapo blocked your link so I can't be sure).
    I am touched. Deeply, deeply touched.

  3. Yeah it does seem to be that others are just plain not interested.

  4. Think nothing of it, Mr RealMenWriteLongCopy - more insight in that than most of the spurious, jargon-tastic shite you find on the majority of blogs. And it made me laugh. These are both good things.

    (Of course, if you fancied, you could repay me by posting amusing/embarrassing pictures of Mr Gowar...)