Simply download this pic onto your phone and show it to your boss when you amble in at 10.
That’s right, a plastic bag has somehow shrink-wrapped itself around some poor soul's gear cassette. What are the chances of THAT happening!
(Apologies that the picture is a bit blurry. My hand was quivering with rage at the time of shooting.)
TIP: for added excuse authenticity, a nice touch is to get a bit of oil onto your hands. Just ask any cyclist.